1) Our first tip to build self-esteem is first to buy yourself a nice notebook or diary . Then each day, commit to writing something nice about yourself in it. Self-esteem comes from the inside so it’s important to build up a positive view of yourself from the inside out. Most people find it much easier to say something negative about themselves so you may find it a bit difficult at first to think of things you actually like about yourself. However, Don’t give as it will get easier! You could write down that you are a good friend, have a nice smile or treat your pets with kindness. Or you could write down that you got the kids off to school on time or cooked up a healthy dinner . It really doesn’t matter what you say but learning to say nice thing about yourself is one of the quickest ways to build up your self esteem.
2) The second tip to build your self esteem is about giving up the need to be perfect. Perfection is simply unattainable for any of us. Let it go. The truth is, You’re never going to have the perfect body, the perfect life, the perfect relationship, the perfect children, or the perfect home because as a human being, you are perfectly imperfect! So…Instead of always looking for that illusive perfection, why not start to feel satisfaction about who you are right now rather than always wishing that things were better or different for you. Making mistakes, learning new things and getting things wrong are just part of life so why not strive for happiness and satisfaction rather than perfectionism?
3) Our third tip to build self esteem is to stop comparing yourself negatively to other people. Remember,You are not supposed to be like anyone else. You are you. You are the only one who can be you and you are unique. Your perspectives, gifts and value are exclusively yours so quit comparing yourself and your achievements with other people. Remember as well that Comparisons are unfair because you don’t really know as much as you think you do about other people’s lives, or what it’s really like to be them. So instead of comparing yourself to others, why not accept that we are all different and celebrate and honour who you are and your unique personality and life choices.
4) Our fourth tip to build self esteem is stop beating yourself up and being your own worst enemy. We often treat strangers with more kindness than we treat ourselves so it is about time you started to be a little kinder to yourself. Every time you criticise yourself or beat yourself up, you are literally breaking down your self-esteem. Many of us have just got used to it and repeat harmful messages we may have heard from other people in our lives over and over in our head. So today, send your inner critic on a long holiday and make a commitment to treating yourself with a little more compassion and kindness. This could mean having more patience with yourself, giving yourself a break when things are not going to plan and also giving yourself some well-deserved praise on a daily basis.
5) The final tip to boost Self Esteem is to start to change your focus towards what you want to happen in your life rather than all the bad things which may have happened in the past. Many of us spend most of our days re living and re thinking about all the things that went wrong or didn’t work out well in the past. This only keeps us feeling bad and stuck in a pattern of negative thinking. So, in order to boost your self-esteem, take some time to focus on what things you would like to happen in your future. Start with a list of positive emotions or feelings that you would like to feel such as calm, confident, relaxed or happy. Then, sit for a few minutes each day feeling how nice it would be to regularly experience these positive emotions. The more you do this, the more likely you are to train your thoughts to think about happy things in the future, rather than the negative stuff of the past.
Life Coaching with Lisa Phillips
Award Winning Life Coach and Confidence Coach Lisa Phillips is the founder of Amazing Coaching UK and Amazing Coaching AU. She has over 20 years experience and is also a qualified counseller and NLP Practitioner. Lisa works with face to face clients, provides Zoom and Skype Life Coaching and also offers a range of online courses.