Own up – are you one of those people who lie in bed worrying about all the things that could go wrong? If so, this newsletter on ‘ 5 Tips to stop worrying’ is for you!
Why do we Worry?
The degree in which we worry has a lot to do with the family we grew up in and whether we picked up the art of being a worry wart at an early age. Some of the key reasons why people worry are as follows:
- It’s a bad habit – We have just got used to it or it is a ‘ learned behaviour’ we picked up from our family.
- Fear of what could go wrong – We don’t think we will be able to cope if things go wrong
- Worrying that you ( or other people) will not be able to cope – We don’t have confidence in other people that they will cope!
- We want to control the outcome ( We are control freaks!)
National Worry Survey
In a recent national worry survey, it was identified that
Females are more likely to worry about:
- My Future Career
- The Future
- My Weight
- My Achievements
- What people think of me
Males are more likely to worry about:
- My Future Career
2. My Achievements
3. The Future
4. What people think of me
5. Doing well at Work / School
So we really are a nation of worriers regardless of our sex!
The problem with worrying
Apart from the fact that worrying actually doesn’t make anything better nor does it actually achieve anything, constant worry is not good for our health.
Not only is it exhausting but other side effects include:
- excessive, ongoing worry and tension.
- an unrealistic view of problems.
- restlessness or a feeling of being edgy.
- muscle tension.
- muscle aches.
5 Tip to Stop Worrying
Here are my 5 tips to stop worrying:
Soothe your worries downstream by using soothing phrases such as:
- It will all turn out ok – I will cope
- I know it may not feel like it but everything is working out for me
- I don’t have to think about this right now, it’s not urgent
- I will be ok, I can ask for help if I need it.
- Things have a way of working out in the end, I don’t need to worry about this right now
Treat Yourself like a small child
If a small child came to you worried about their life what would you say to them? Of course you would encourage them and tell them it will all work out ok – Do this to yourself through your self talk!
Shift Your Mood
If you find yourself ruminating about worries then get up and shift your mood! It doesn’t matter what you do, you could go for a walk or dance naked around the living room but if you shift the energy in your body, you will shift your mood.
Trust that you can Handle it.
A lot of the worrying we do is based on the fact that we think we won’t be able to handle situations if they ‘ go wrong’ or don’t go according to plan. Remind yourself that you will be able to handle it – even if things don’t work out like you expected them to.
Write your worries down.
Writing your worries down helps them get out of the ‘ darkness’ of your mind, into the ‘ light of the paper’. Write your worries down and then try to let go of them. Put a date next to the worry if you like and tell yourself you don’t have to worry about it until the future date. You will be amazed how quickly the date will pass and you have saved yourself a lot of worry time.
When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.”
Lisa Phillips – Northamptonshire Life Coaching
Based in Northamptonshire, Lisa Phillips is an award winning Life Coach and Confidence expert. Lisa works with people around the Northamptonshire, Leicestershire, Rutland, Cambridgeshire and Peterborough areas. She also provides Skype Life Coaching sessions around the world. Lisa has over 20 years experience and is the author of ‘ The Confidence Coach’. To find out more about how the Northamptonshire Life Coach can assist you, please see www.amazingcoaching.co.uk.
Lisa is a very popular Northamptonshire Speaker and you can find out more about her work as a speaker here.