Are you someone who is always supporting other people? Are you the friend or family member that it always on the other end of the phone if someone is upset, angry, hurt or needs help? Believe me, Compassion fatigue is real!
What is Compassion Fatigue?
Compassion fatigue is when you become drained of your own energy as you focus on caring for other people and their problems. As a write this weeks Amazing Coaching blog, the world is struggling with the outbreak of Covid 19. As a result, increasing amounts of people are struggling with uncertainty about their health, wealth and wellbeing. However, this is not a reason to burden yourself with other peoples problems. Why? Because these are other peoples problems – not yours!
Compassion Fatigue is real and is the negative effect of caring about other people too much.
Signs of Compassion Fatigue.
- Feeling burdened by other peoples problems
- Feeling stressed by what other people are going though
- Literally feeling the emotions of other peoples upset
- Physical and mental fatigue
- Worrying about what other people are going through.
Supporting v’s Enabling
You can support someone without it having a negative impact on your life. This includes having boundaries in place, being able to switch off the phone when you need a break and recognising that fixing other peoples problems is not your responsibility. Many of us fail to keep these important boundaries in place. We make it our responsibility to ‘ fix other people and their problems’ . As a result, we may become enablers allowing other people to continue their self destructive behaviour. Get honest here, do you have people in your life who have been draining your energy with their problems for a long time?
You need to protect yourself!
Some people don’t have boundaries. I occasionally come across this with my Life Coaching clients where they constantly text me between our sessions or send me pages and pages of emails to read! If it is one off – it is not a problem. I am here to support them. However, when I find they contact me for every small issue, it is time to reinforce to them to take back their own power and implement what I have taught them during our Life Coaching sessions.
Try these tips for dealing with Compassion Fatigue
- You can listen to someone with compassion without getting involved. Take back your energy and put your self care first.
- Remind yourself, you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make them drink! This is particularly important for those people in your life who come to you with the same problems day in day out!
- Be more mindful of your energy rather than ‘ fixing’ other people. It is not your job!
- Remind yourself you are not responsible for other peoples happiness – nor is anyone responsible for yours.
- Spend more time on your own self care and do more things that make you feel good
- Don’t feel guilty when putting boundaries in place to protect yourself.
- Care more about how YOU feel – you cannot help anyone while you are living an upstream life!
Northamptonshire Life Coaching
With over 22 years experience, Lisa Phillips is an award winning Life Coach and Confidence expert. Previously based in Sydney, Australia, she is also the author of ‘ The Confidence Coach’ book. Lisa works with clients all over the world and is currently the Confidence expert on The Love Destination TV.
Lisa offers face to face coaching, online Life Coaching sessions. She also offers a 6 week Life Coaching online course.
Why not contact Lisa Phillips today for a no obligation chat?