Lacking Confidence

It doesn’t matter whether you are a Company Director or stay at home mum; lacking confidence can restrict you from moving forward in life.

How has your lack of self esteem or lacking confidence held you back?  Has it stopped you asking for that pay rise, putting yourself forward for that great job or has it resulted in someone taking advantage of you or treating you like a doormat?

It is easier than you think

Building confidence is easier than you think.  However, Interestingly, one of key obstacles people encounter when increasing confidence is that they realise they really have a bigger fear that is holding them back – the fear of what could happen if they do start to change!

More than often it is the fear of what ‘may happen’ that can actually stop us taking action. These fears keep us small and comfortable and often relate to how other people will react towards us if we do begin to become a more confident and assertive person.

Some common fears which may hold us back include:

Worrying what people will think if you do speak up for yourself
Concern that you will end up upsetting someone or letting them down
Thoughts about other people not liking you any more
Strong beliefs about always needing to be seen as a nice person!

Although staying small may feel more comfortable or the easy option, it often ends up in resentment, frustration and blaming other people for situations we find ourselves in.

Do you end up saying yes to attend functions even though you don’t really want to? Do you feel obliged to do things because you want to be seen as a nice girl or you don’t want to let anyone else down? Do you end up saying Yes when you really mean No? It may seem the easier option but at what cost to yourself? The chances are you will end up feeling resentful or blame other people (and yourself!) for asking you in the first place!

Now based in the UK,  Confidence Coach Lisa Phillips is the author of The Confidence Coach.   To find out more about Lisa, please see or

Northamptonshire Guest Speaker