The art of self soothing is an important practice both for children and adults. Learning to self sooth yourself gives you the power to change your emotional state and give yourself relief from negative emotions.
When you consciously soothe yourself, you are also healing your inner child, reducing the energy around negative feelings and importantly, giving yourself relief from negative emotions such as anxiety and fear. Self soothing helps you close the gap between where you are now, and where you want to be!
Sadly, many of us were not taught from an early age the importance of self soothing. When we are scared, worried or hurt, we often turn upon ourselves with harsh and critical words rather than giving ourselves the gift of soothing, gentle and encouraging words.
What is Self Soothing?
If a young 5 year old child ran to you feeling scared, hurt or nervous – what would you say to them? Would you shout at them or tell them off (like you do yourself)? Or would you choose some soothing words to ease their fears and encourage them to feel better?
In order to soothe yourself, you must treat yourself like this young child. You must soothe your own fears with kind words, compassion and understanding. Learning to self soothe means you consciously focus to reach for a thought that gives you relief from negative emotions.
Here are some self soothing phrases to try:
Even though it may not feel like it, things have a way of working out
I am doing my best
I can let this go, it is more important for me to feel good right now
This will pass
It’s ok, it will be ok, it will pass, I will be fine.
Remember, everyone is different so it is important to reach for the soothing word or phrase that feel good to you. This is also how you close the gap in your stream, moving yourself from upstream emotions, to downstream emotions.
It can take a bit of practice simply because you are more dominant in beating yourself up that being kind to yourself.
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